It's 3 a.m.

I fell asleep around 12:30 only to be startled at 3:00 a.m. by Ellie's shrieking, "Mommy! Mommy! No Mommy!" It sounded like she was having a nightmare so I rushed into her room. One leg was hung over the side of her crib. She must have made an escape attempt, but then was unable to swing her leg back into the crib which then caused her to go beserk.

I was weak. I went to help her swing her leg back into the crib and lay her down, but found myself holding her. After 2 solid years of sleep training I finally broke. So I changed her diaper and decided to sleep with her on the floor in her room. She dozed off for some time and then woke up again, never able to get fully comfortable.

At 4:30, I had to wake Jae for help. At this point, she was more than awake and shamefully took advantage of her daddy's loving nature. He showed her Pingu, gave her some water, climbed up and down the stairs several times to try and calm her. Nothing worked.

At 6:30, I turned off the alarm clock as Jae and Ellie walked into the room. "Looks like we're going to have to tag team." Ellie landed next to me on the bed and snuggled under the covers. She fell asleep instantly and started to snore. Jae went to the bathroom to sleep in the shower.

At 7:30, Ellie woke up and told me, "get up. get up mommy. downstairs!"

I can't do this another night.